Grief is a profoundly agonizing realm to inhabit

Grief shatters your heart into countless fragments

It plunges you into profound despair and unfathomable agony

Grief magnifies your existing sorrows into internal anguish

Losing you, my mother, pierced deep into my soul

Just a moment ago, you were checking up on me

I struggled to reconcile my beliefs and perceptions

What did I overlook, mother, what did I fail to see?

Why did you not disclose and teach me all that was necessary, why not me, mom?

I strive to address all the uncertainties and reasons without your guidance

My burden is heavy, they say I carry it well

I must carry it, for it is my narrative to share

This grief cuts like blades deep within my core

It disrupts my mental and emotional harmony, leaving no space for solace

The pain impedes my healing, its throbbing persists

Initially, I did not turn to God; I felt abandoned

I called out to you, mother, mother, what is happening?

Where did this anguish originate, mother, how do I rid myself of it?

Grief greeted you with wounds, inflicted more wounds, and left you with wounds more agonizing than the rest

Grief is callous, indifferent, and indiscriminate, welcoming us all

I was unprepared for your premature departure, I cannot find peace

Why am I immobilized, why do I wish to remain still, where could I possibly go, to whom and what can I express?

All I yearned to demonstrate and offer you as a token of my appreciation

You encouraged me to persevere, and I wanted you to witness my journey to the end

I wanted you to witness my success and support me in my future endeavors

Your absence caused a significant delay, a delay I initially resisted but later embraced

as I needed to learn how to cope, how to heal

You see, mother, along the way, I sought out the branches of the family tree

Despite most leaves having fallen, I reached out for the branches, yet,

They resisted me like a fierce hurricane wind blowing against them

They swayed in every direction to avoid aiding me through my grief

It is as if you never existed, your name absent from their lips

Why, mother, why do they refuse to speak your name?

This intensifies my sorrow, mother, grieving for you alone, in silent solitude

Nevertheless, I do not mind, as I find solace in my own company, perhaps too much

The passage of time undoubtedly aids in healing, serving as therapy for my soul

I began without knowing how to heal my conscious or semi-conscious spirit

A mother of unwavering dedication, a mother of love

You were my pillar, my tranquility, my source of strength

My mother, the courageous, the motivator, and the influencer

You raised me with love and complete commitment to my development

I am forever grateful for who you were

I needed more time; I still need you

I apologize, mommy, for the times I took you for granted

I wished to offer you a better life, to see you heal in a better place

The chance to fulfill the dreams I had for you vanished with your passing

I can visualize your face, hear your voice, and feel your presence

I miss the sound of your voice directing me to action

I recall the pain in your voice at the thought of your children's suffering

I remember your worries about the dangers surrounding your children and grandchildren

Your devotion to your children was boundless and invaluable

You are the true heroine of my life thus far, mother, you embodied a part of my existence

It was your words of encouragement, even in moments of misunderstanding, that I

cherish and long for the most

Your non-judgmental aura and generous nature were deeply appreciated

The things only your children know will be our cherished memories

You shielded me countless times throughout my life and continue to protect me in death

All the lessons you imparted during your time with me have shaped my way of living

You taught me to lay down my arms of judgment towards others

You taught me to give, and in return, I shall receive

When you say, "Bless you, my child," those words will resonate with me eternally

As time elapses, the pain lessens, and the burden feels lighter, yet the scars remain

Your love will permeate through my very being

If given the choice in my next life, I would want the same mother as in this one

I vouch for you in the afterlife, mother, I hope you have found your peace

I pray to God for your strength and goodness in this life, I know you are with God